I'll Do What I Have To .... Jut for You

I'll cry for you,

I'll bleed for you,

I'll do whatever I need to,

Just for you.



To make you love me,

To make you care,

To make you wonder,

Why I do these things I do.



Your all I want,

And everthing I need,

I dream the dreams,

Just for you.



So please take my hand,

Tell me you'll always be there,

Say you won't leave me,

No matter what goes on.



What am I talking about,

"I will" is a has been,

I'm already bleeding for you,

Isn't that enough,

What more do you want?



I'm sorry I do these things,

That I dont dance in the rain,

But I cry in it,

Just for you.



I've spent my life,

Waiting, Wanting, Willing,

Believing, Becoming, and Bleeding

Just for you.



I gave you my heart,

You hid it in shame,

Now I'll make it disappear,

Just for you



I'll give you your wish

So here it is,

This bullet,

It just for you

Remember.....

Remember when getting high meant swinging on the playground???

When the only protection you were concerned about was wearing a helmet??

When the worst thing you could get from boys were cooties??

Dad's shoulders were the highest place on earth and mom was your hero??

Your worst enemies were you siblings??

Race issues were about who could run faster??

When war was only a card game??

the only drug you knew was cough medicine??

When wearing a skirt didn't make you a .....??

When the worst word you knew was that word you dad used while fixing somthing??

The only thing that hurt were your scrapped up knees ??

We just couldn't wait to grow up. Don't you wish you'd take life seriously??

Life's too short to wake up one morning with regrets.

So love the people who treat you right, Forget about the ones who don't

and believe that everything happens for a reason.

Believe in yourself.

Believe in a God.

Believe in your morals.

Whatever you do just believe, just do it for the thrill.

If you get a chance, take it.

If it changes life, let it.

If it takes it, fight it.

Nobody said it would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.

! Easter !

I absolutly love easter. Aside from the whole beautiful colors and easter bunny concept, there are so many great meanings and symbols to it. its just so powerful.. haha i really don't feel like writing right now ... so instead I'm just ognna show my passion for spring and easter with images, since everyone knows pictures are worth a million words.

The 100 + things

Lately I've been thinkin about people dying... mostly because I've just seen my 3 favorite movies recently. ( the blind side, the Ultimate gift, and Across the Universe) so i figured that i don't wanna be that old lady tellin kids with regret that they should go out and live their lives. No i wanna be that lady who had the time of her life as a young adult and child, but still was able to make a life for herself. Tellin the kids " your only young once". I wanna live my whole life like I'm dying. So basically I wanna live life with no regrets and do everything i want to do to the best of my ability. In order to remember it all i thought I'd just put them down here. That way they are 4ever in stone. well not quite but. Something i can look back on and check off and reminisce with when in like 40, 50 years. So here it goes, be prepared to be here awhile. I have high hopes and dreams for myself.

1. Skydiving





2. Bungee Jumping





3. Go to Hollywood





4. Live in 90210





5. Learn to Break dance





6. C ~ walk





7. Sing Screamo





8. Live in Austerlia





9. Be confident in myself





10. Rainbow hair





11. Streaking





12. Skinny dipping





13. Make a Million $





14. Go to College





15. House Party





16. Travel to Africa





17. Between the Trees Concert





18. New York Holiday





19. Make over my Fear of the Ocean





20. Try all drugs





21. Work in a Zoo





22. Kiss in the Rain





23. Perfect picnic





24. Own 3 exotic animals





25. Write a song





26. Date a Scene boy





27. Prom queen





28. Visit every U.S State





29. Cheerleader





30. Star on Degrassi





31. Pole Dance / Stripper





32. Get Married





33. Donate 5 gal of blood





34. Visit the Foutian of Love





35. Become Manager





36. Spend a nite/week in Jail





37. Dance in a Thunderstorm





38. Bench 145 lb.





39. Model





40. Be my kids Best Friend





41. Live in the Playboy Mansion





42. Learn to Quilt





43. Loose 15 lb.





44. Stretch All the way in the Splits





45. Ride an Elephant





46. Meet Escape the Fate





47. Live in Europe





48. Be Best Friends With Paris





49. Chill with Eminem





50. Change Someone's Life





51. Learn to Play any Guitar





52. Kiss a Girl





53. Smoke 5 bowls





54. Meet my Mom





55. Own a Great Dane





56. Sleep beneath the Stars





57. Aquire an Italian accent





58. Speak French





59. Own a Ranch





60. Have Kids





61. Grow a garden





62. Million $ shopping Spree





63. Loose control





64. Be in a Parade





65. Join a Band





66. Learn to Crochette





67. Breakdown in someone's arms





68. Screw someone's life





69. Paint a Master peice





70. Be in a Music Video





71. Change my Name





72. Own a Clothing line





73. Get a boob job





74. Have a Life long best friend





75. Become a victum of Somthing bad





76. Keep a dirty secret





77. Aquire patientes





78. Have Lushes hair





79. Be in a commercial





80. Save an Anmial's life





81. Be unpreddictable





82. Be in a movie





83. Not Care what People think





84. Be in a gang





85. Be an Artist of a Famous Quote





86. Love God with All my Heart





87. Be a Heart breaker





88. Own a Yacht





89. Stay a Gymnast





90. Sail down the Amazon





91. Live on San juan Islands





92. Have a Fish tank wall





93. Becoma an idol





94. Dont judge





95. Become a positive person





96. Own a porshe





97. Have 5 mansions





98. Have a record Label





99. Have an Enormos Wardrobe





100. Fall in Love

Just another day 3/26

ugh.. yesterday we did like a big work out in P.E ( body shaping is what I'm taking) and now my abs hurt like really bad. A lot of people were absent today because it was a half day... Miranda wasn't there so i just hung out with Melissa and Elizabeth ( what a whore) during P.E.. hahaha.. normally I don't work out with them because i have my own group with Mackenzie and Sam, but one of Mackenzie's friends Kayla, her group was all skipping so she joined ours so our group had 4 instead o 3 .. so i just joined Melissa because they only had 2 people. Mackenzie kept calling me back, :0 haha.. today we only had periods 1,2 and 3 and we went home at 10:30. Then i went to my other friend Melissa Brotten's house. She has a lotta kewl people on her bus, even though it is completely empty, where as my bus is completely full. Melissa would never know though hahaha cause she was busy with David. He definitely doesn't like me, i think he's just jealous that Melissa spends so much time with her friends. He wouldn't let her sit on the outside so she could be closer to me.. hahaha whatever. They love each other, its actually really sweet. Katie didn't come to school yesterday.. I was a lil' frustrated at first because she was supposed to bring me a black dress. So all i wore to school was a pair of black leggings and a very low black shirt and a little striped sweater with a pair of grey wedges... so all in all i looked like a whore.o well .. everyone said i looked cute .. haha but it was so hard walking up the hill to Melissa's house. it is half a mile and i had a blister an my right foot. : (... o well it was fun .. we had macaroni and cheese, made brownies and ate all of it except the edges, watched music videos, talked, and rode her horses. haha I rode Mandy english and Melissa rode Cali western. it was fun. the only thing is though is that Mandy bit me in the butt! it rained on us a lil' so we decided to go in but when we got in it stopped raining.. of course

New Hair??

Ok so i wanna get my hair cut and colored, but im not sure if my mom will let me. hmm.... she might go for the cut but im no so sure bout the color.i really like a lot of scene hair, but im not sure if im ready to take that step yet. hahaha cause once its done im gonna start getting judged by it and im not sure if i want that. i mean i definatly feel that way inside a lot, not all the time but. i just like hiding it more than showing it.i think i might start by getting that cut and the extensions and then dying it black. then a lil' later i'll get the coontails and color. i know I like it but what do you think ??? Please comment.

It Really Is Me

They tell me I've changed but I'm still me
Can't you see
I've just put up walls
So you have to go through long halls
To get me
Because I'm so scared
That nobody cares
So I'm Sorry I'm different
And I'm a lil' resistant
I just need more time
To be fine
To learn to trust again
To do what I must
To get back to where I used to be
Just wait and see
I'll be fine
Just gotta find what I lack
Then I'll be back
A better me
But first some dirt
And I know there will be some hurt
You might think I've died
Dont worry I'll come out the otherside
Then you will see
It really is me